


On Gabriel's Golden Wings

by Samoose



Category: Supernatural
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-01-11
Updated: 2013-04-25
Packaged: 2017-11-25 01:44:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 11,417
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/633761
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Samoose/pseuds/Samoose
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Gabriel had been assigned to watch over the Winchester family from the very beginning of everything. Things were going well until he heard whispers of new orders being given on high. To stand down from protecting Sam. He couldn't comply, and so he went into 'witness protection' until the boys forced him to surface once again and his life truly began.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

 

To be completely honest neither Sam or Gabe thought they'd end up here. Sitting in a motel room laughing about some joke Gabe had thought up and actually enjoying one another's company. They shared something now that neither one had dared to feel for years...peace. From the beginning it was never meant to end up this way. There had been a plan; thinking back on it now Gabriel laughed at the idea. But he sure as hell wasn't laughing back then, at the start of it all...hindsight is 20/20 so they say.

 

**-The Beginning-**

Heaven and all of its angels were like a well-oiled machine. There was already a script written for everything that would happen in the world and all of the angels knew their parts. Of course, there were bumps in the road. Everyone knows the story of Lucifer falling from heaven, but he wasn't the only angel to stray from the script.

Gabriel had, for a time, felt personally wounded by his brother's betrayal... but what he didn't realize is that he himself would be the next to stray. Then again, who's to say that this wasn't God's secret script from the very beginning?

Gabriel was actually kind of excited about his role in all of this. He would descend to Earth when the time was right and befriend Mary and John Winchester before they had their second child. Before the demon Azazel would stalk into that child's bedroom and jumpstart the apocalypse. It had been destined to happen from day one, but with Gabriel protecting the young child it would not come to pass. He would be a savior, a hero! The name Sam Winchester echoed in his mind from the beginning of creation and all he could do was look forward to the day that it would be more than just a name.

...It was time. And it couldn't have come soon enough. To be honest, Gabriel was eager to get out of Heaven. Being an angel was like being the kid who worked for a magic show. All the other kids are in awe but you know the truth behind the tricks and for you all the magic is gone. Earth was way more interesting, humans were interesting. Gabriel only started to pay special attention to them because of his brother Lucifer. He had looked up to him so much.

Lucifer had taught Gabriel to loosen up, to play pranks, and to think for himself to a degree. The only thing that saved Gabriel from being cast out was the fact that he wasn't jealous of humankind, he was intrigued by them. Humans didn't all have scripts, they had complete free will and they didn't know about their fates ahead of time. It was beautiful. He recognized the flaws that his older brother was so frustrated with but those flaws only endeared humankind to him more. As he considered his luck he scoured the planet for his vessel and prepared to make contact.

* * *

 

**-Mid-February, 1979-**

The archangel Gabriel walked into a grocery store in Lawrence Kansas in the tall, dark, handsome body of Alex Cooper, a devout family man from Ohio. Even he had no idea that this would not be his last stop in the vessel department, but that was all to come.

His gaze fell almost immediately on John Winchester who was standing with two cans of baby formula in his hands looking confused. Gabe made his way down the aisle casually, hesitating as he passed by the other man and then appearing as if he was going to keep walking. All part of the plan, he turned around slowly and cleared his throat with an apologetic look on his face "Sorry, you uh...look like you could really use a hand there." John was snapped out of his thoughts and his pensive expression melted away to embarrassment "...Yeah... I guess I really could."

Gabe edged in and took a look between the two cans before pulling a third off the shelf and offering it to him "Try this one. So you're a first timer, huh?" John thanked him and took the can, placing the others back on the shelf "Is it really so obvious?" they both laughed and Gabe waved the thought away "No, it's fine, it was just a wild guess." and he turned to leave.

Just then Mary rounded the corner, her radiance threw Gabriel off and he found himself standing there just staring instead of moving out of her way. She gasped and looked up at him from the baby in her arms as John came up and snuck past Gabe to sneak an arm around his wife's waist "Ah, before you go, this is my wife." he explained, brimming with pride.

Mary smiled, leaning into John, "It's Mary, and you are?" "Gabriel, but just call me Gabe." the angel offered before looking around "I really should..." John cut him off "Oh, right! Well...Welcome to town, Gabe. It was good to meet you." Gabriel wasn't surprised in such a small town that news about him moving in had already spread.

Over the next week Gabriel found himself running into the Winchesters 'by chance' at least a dozen times. Finally, while sitting in a bar with John one night laughing over stories about work, John asked "would you like to come over for dinner tomorrow, Gabe? "

...and he did...funny thing was that he  _actually_  did.

Gabe flashed a genuine smile "'Course I would John." And that's how it began. Soon Gabriel was coming over every day, complaining about how John had been holding out on him with Mary's amazing cooking, and chatting with Mary about Dean.

Life with John and Mary was paradise on earth. Other than the occasional domestic disputes they were a perfect couple. Watching Dean grow up, though, was the most special to him.

Gabe always did have a soft spot for kids. He even bought him a Halloween costume one year...a fire-fighter outfit. Dean was always wondering how "Uncle Gabe" knew exactly what he wanted. That's right, "Uncle Gabriel" became a common title for him over the years.

A part of him didn't ever want to stop this, to just stay on Earth and keep being Uncle Gabe for all the time he could manage.

When Sam was born Gabe started to really get excited. The time was coming when he could really shine, and even reveal himself as an archangel in all his glory.

He knew John and Mary would have questions, everyone did, but for once in his long life he was actually eager to answer them all.


	2. Chapter 2

 

Watching Mary hold little baby Sam in her arms was more than Gabriel could have imagined. It was beautiful and perfect all at once, because this was how the Winchesters were supposed to look. This was history in the making, right before his eyes, and he was the hero. The countdown had begun.

Still, in the meantime, life went on. John was excited, but he was also having trouble adjusting to life with two kids. Maybe he had a bad feeling about little Sammy, but if he did he never even told Gabe about it.

John needed space, not too much, he just needed a minute alone to think. Of course, in times like these alone really meant with his best friend. Gabe was pacing the street near the phone booth where John was calling to check in at home.

"I just have to take care of some business, Mary. I'm sorry, I'll be home soon. Just a few days."

On the other end Mary stood in the kitchen after making Dean a sandwich. "No John, we're not having this conversation again."

John huffed, Mary was beautiful and he loved her but sometimes he didn't think he was cut out to be in a relationship at all. He needed to get away even if she didn't like it. "Just think about-"

Mary cut him off. "Think about  _what?_  You have two boys at home..." Her gaze slipped to little Dean as John spoke.

"I don't want to talk about this anymore, I've told you before that I need time to think about all this."

Mary was so...so tired of the fighting. "Fine, don't. There's nothing more to talk about."

John said something he hoped sounded comforting and hung up. As Gabe and John started to walk down the road to a nearby diner, Dean, back in the kitchen wearing an 'I wuv hugz' t-shirt, was clinging to his mother's legs and assuring her, "It's okay mom, dad still loves you. I love you too, I'll never leave you."

 

**A couple days later**

John did come home, with Gabriel in tow. The elder Winchester said hello to Dean, exchanged a look with Mary, and then went upstairs to clean up.

Gabriel walked into the dining room and gave Mary a kiss on the cheek as she whispered, "thank you for looking out for him, Gabe."

The angel gave her a comforting smile, "Always. And don't worry, he'll be fine. He loves you very much." She seemed visibly relieved, she had needed to hear it. Finally with one more reassuring squeeze to her arm, Gabe turned an excited face to Dean.

"Hey, big man! How's it been without me? Boring, huh?" and Dean smiled, but there was a shadow hidden in his eyes of a child that wasn't fooled. That didn't stop Gabe from pulling the toy race car track out and declaring a race, winner getting the entire pie after dinner.

Mary clucked her tongue and narrowed her eyes at him, he groaned like an exasperated child. "Fiiiiine a  _piece_  of pie, then". He let Dean win sometimes, and  _this_  was one of those times. Of course Gabriel always stole the kid's whip cream off the top of his pie, winning himself Dean's best lead-filled stare until he replaced it.

Over the next series of weeks, John and Gabe often skipped out and drove out of town where they parked the Impala in an open field. They laid on the hood, looked up at the stars, and talked.

John never asked about Gabriel's past and he was thankful for it. With the absence of prying, their friendship was flawless and sometimes Gabriel forgot he was really an angel. In those moments, staring up at the stars, Gabriel was infinite. He felt both small and important all at the same time, a miracle.

It wasn't until the energy of his wings at his back thrummed that he sighed and smiled a fond sadness, so  _that_  was what it felt like to be human. Did they realize how important they were? How important they would continue to be? He knew they didn't. In a way, that made them even more amazing. They didn't see how wonderful they were and yet they kept trying to be better than how they saw themselves.

Such beautiful humanity.

Through all the years they had been together, Mary and John never stayed angry with one another for too long. They both had fiery personalities and they had different ideas about how to lead life, but they were also in love. That love pulled them back together time and time again. It was only deepened by the addition of the love for their children.

Dean had been born worldly, an aged soul from the very beginning, maybe a part of his soul felt what was coming. The young Winchester seemed to take every little fight between his parents as the beginning of the end, and he was always there stepping up to take care of everyone.

Gabriel adored him, thought of him like a son, and wanted nothing but to relieve the pressure from him... he was walking in John's deep footsteps more and more each day.

Gabriel was proud, sure, but he also wanted to get some fun in there and show him how to loosen up the way his elder brother Lucifer had once done for him.

For most of his time on Earth, Heaven had been silent in Gabe's ears. It almost startled him when Raph's voice came to him out of nowhere, demanding an update on the mission. He reported back dutifully, snapping back into guardian angel mode so quickly he almost got personality whiplash.

The only time he had tuned into the 'angel radio' had been near the beginning. There had been whispers among the archangels of shifting authorities up above with the absence of God's presence. The rest of Heaven still remained oblivious as to how dire the situation was, how God had truly abandoned them, or so it seemed. And so, all the angels, as they always had done before, turned to the archangels for guidance.

It was bound to happen; one of them would step up and start to call the shots in the name of God. The lesser angels would simply think that God was still pulling the strings. Gabe especially wasn't surprised that the archangel that took on the responsibility was Raphael.

Gabe was feeling good about his mission...Sam was five and a half months old and soon it would be time to stop Azazel, and then he could return to heaven victorious. He had fantasies about returning to Earth to check up on the Winchesters, stay for dinner, birthday parties, attend baseball games. As an archangel in Heaven with no-one but his brothers to stop him, why not live a little?

Dinner that night had been more than amazing and he was laughing over something Dean had said...it was totally inappropriate and he had definitely picked it up from Uncle Gabe. Gabriel grinned sheepishly at the eyes Mary cut at him, but was encouraged by John laughing.

He walked over and ruffled Dean's hair, taking up everyone's plates and carrying them into the kitchen, he was positively glowing...and then he was startled by an unexpected call from Raphael, straight to the mind, as most angel 'calls' went. Gabe felt frantic, confused. Raph was saying the mission had changed, he was to stand by and let everything happen. Let Azazel get to Sam? What about the apocalypse? What about Sam and Dean?

He tried to ask why God would change his plans but the commanding archangel was less than helpful, he chided Gabe like a younger brother. Told him not to question, just obey. Told him that being around humans was affecting his judgment and that if he didn't watch himself he would be punished when he came home.

Gabriel panicked, he heard Mary calling out to him, asking if he was okay. He couldn't let this happen but he couldn't face his brothers and God and all of heaven. No. No this could not happen to them, not his precious wards. His  _family._

The angel turned and smiled softly at his favorite humans in the entire world. "No I'm fine, just a headache, I think I'm gonna get going early tonight ... let me just say goodnight to Sammy." John was visibly not convinced, but he let it go. Gabriel was his best friend and he would tell him if something was up.

Sam was upstairs in his crib and Gabe slowly ascended the stairs, pausing to relish in every creak of the floorboards and paint fleck on the walls. He felt the decision in his gut like a cold weight before he fully thought it. When he stood in Sam's nursery with the rest of the family downstairs he fully came to his decision.

He reached out and took the sleeping Sam's tiny hand in his, letting his chin rest on the side of the crib. "Sammy... I'm sorry." He almost choked on the words.

Suddenly he was aware of the unfair and painful life the boys had ahead of them, only hoping that the boys' parents would somehow make it okay for them.

He didn't say goodbye to John or Mary, he just left, feeling like the biggest coward in the universe.

And that was the first time he let Sam down.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mary and Dean's dialogues from the first paragraph are taken exactly from 5.16, so that's why it probably sounds familiar. I obviously don't own Supernatural and I borrowed the dialogue =P


	3. Chapter 3

 

Gabriel knew Heaven would be hot on his tail. He knew that he couldn't parade around in Alex's body anymore. Luckily, Alex had a brother. Gabriel had access to memories of this brother, Danny, and he had to admit that he liked what he saw. Danny had once owned a music shop but he had been forced to close when he fell on hard times. Alex had been keeping him financially afloat and looking out for him... yeah Danny was the kind of guy that would easily say yes. He didn't know how Danny would react to his brother returning after all these years, all he knew for sure was that he had to move quickly.

More than once or twice he wanted to turn back, to stand against Heaven and protect his friends... but he just couldn't bring himself to do it. The more he struggled with himself, the more he wanted to run.

Gabriel's search for Danny Cooper didn't take long. He located the man in a club in Kansas. He grimaced at the sight of his new vessel...he was down on his luck to say the least. Honestly the archangel had never given much thought to Alex's family before taking over, but now he felt actual regret for his apathy. What had life with the Winchesters done to him?

Gabriel kept a keen ear on the 'angel radio', he didn't have long. Once Sam turned six months old all the angels on high would realize that the archangel wasn't at ground zero anymore. He had mere weeks in the best case scenario.

He was invisible for now, following the man through the club. He had to choose his angle of attack; find a good way to convince Danny to agree to basically forfeit the rest of his life. Not many human consciousnesses could survive making room for an archangel's grace. It wasn't a painless or peaceful end... and now that he knew so well how precious human life was... that really meant something.

Danny was being aggressively escorted out of the club, he turned and hissed something cruel to the bouncer but his voice cracked and all the intimidation was lost. He was drunk, and not worth getting upset over.

He stared at the door of the club for a few long seconds before a low whine snapped him to attention. A small Jack Russell terrier was peeking out at him from the alley nearby... the dog stepped over carefully and looked up at him with expectation. Danny couldn't resist, he dropped to his knee and put his hand out to be inspected. The dog skipped the formalities and butted his head against the man's hand with trust and love, and all of Danny's anger and frustrations were forgotten.

Gabriel was touched by the man's humanity in the face of tragedy. He was bitter, on the brink of being homeless, his brother had been missing... and yet he took the time to show love to this equally unfortunate creature. Suddenly all Gabriel wanted was to take over this vessel's life and give him the happiness he deserved... geez he really was getting sentimental. Lucifer would have laughed at him.

The archangel took a couple of days to watch Danny live his life, to get to know him better. The man had taken the dog home with him, and they bonded quickly. Secretly a part of Gabe was reluctant to approach this new vessel, to ruin another life just to save himself. In the end he had already made his decision and there was nothing he could do except follow through. And so he did.

Danny was sitting on the couch in his apartment with the unnamed dog cuddled up under his arm when Gabriel finally made himself visible. The dog noticed before the human, perking up and stiffening with apprehension. Danny jumped up, grabbing a nearly phonebook to wield as a weapon before he recognized the body before him.

"Alex!" he held the phonebook up absently and stared in confusion. "How did you... I mean... where have you  _been_? Are you okay?"

Gabriel could feel how much Danny loved his brother. That would make this hard to hear. "Danny. I'm not your brother."

The human was obviously falling deeper into confusion, he chuckled nervously. "A-Alex, man, come on what's gotten into you? Hit your head or something?" The dog was standing close to his human, watching warily.

The angel was not here to play games. He put on a regal expression that demanded respect. "I am not Alex. I am the archangel Gabriel and I'm here to carry out Heaven's will." He inhaled sharply and set his shoulders back, flexing the invisible wings at his back. Energy and warmth surged through the room and then golden light, much like fireflies or dust caught in the sunlight, erupted in the shape of wings at his back. He spread his wings wide and their light painted the room with a golden glow.

Danny could have never been prepared for this. "Oh… my... G-" he dropped the phonebook in his hands and shrieked as it landed on his foot. The Jack Russell, who had been cowering at Danny's feet, turned a vicious growl on the yellow-pages, ready to defend his master.

Gabriel couldn't contain himself, his brow twitched and then a grin snuck onto his face. Soon he was holding his stomach and roaring with laughter as Danny hopped around on one foot. The human stopped hopping around and looked up. "Well... you're not Alex that's for sure. I mean wings aside, he always had a stick so far up his ass that he wouldn't laugh like that."

Twenty minutes later they were sitting on the couch and Gabriel was watching Danny work his way through a bag of candy at a sickening pace. "So, basically you're telling me that you want me to turn over my body to your control... and then you can send Alex back home?" The angel gave a thoughtful nod. "More or less kid, yeah. All you have to do is say yes." It was a lie. Angels lied all the time, who knew. A pleasant lie was far more accepted than the painful truth and in the end it didn't matter what the vessel thought.

Danny sighed and let his hand fall to the dog's head, petting gently. "You're an  _angel_ ," he asserted with shock in his voice, to which Gabriel rolled his eyes. "And you're my vessel. It's an honor...and blahblahblah. I'm sure you get it by now." The human cleared his throat. "Yes. I mean what else can I say...Yes you can do whatever you need to do."

* * *

Gabriel flexed his new hand and looked down at the body of Alex. He would have to dispose of it to throw the angels off his trail. If Danny could understand what was happening beyond the incredible pain of his soul being ripped by Gabriel's grace, he would realize that he had been lied to and his brother was dead. Maybe he would realize that a similar fate awaited him. But the archangel had done things he regretted more in his life than this. A couple of human lives should mean nothing in the eyes of Heaven.

The Jack Russell whined from where it hid underneath a side table. The sound made something deep inside Gabe's heart ache. For all his acting and lying, he did feel remorse, and he did see the value of every individual life. He kneeled and put his hands out, beckoning the animal. "Hey, come on over here. Don't worry, I won't hurt you."

Tentatively the dog stepped forward until Gabe could reach out and ruffle his ears lovingly. He had just the name for the fluffball. "Don't worry Sam, I won't let you down. I'm here."


	4. Chapter 4

November 2nd, 1983.

Gabriel was too late to stop it even if he had wanted to. He watched the house burn from a distance; watched Dean rush out holding little Sammy. His spirit dropped as John ran out looking so pained and flustered. It took a moment for it to dawn on the angel, his blood ran cold and skin prickled as dread settled into his bones. He let his mind brush the edges of John's thoughts but it couldn't be true... Mary.

All at once he was struck by the memories of her smiling face, the way she had loved him like a brother, her pride over her special pie recipes.

Could Mary really be...?

No. This isn't what he meant to happen at all! Sadness and guilt crippled him; he dropped to his knees and choked out a sob.

He had to pull himself together, he couldn't draw attention... but he felt dizzy and space was closing in on him.

Sirens sounded down the road and as he forced himself to fly away he was faced with how purely and sincerely he had loved Mary Winchester.

Gabriel's heart cried out for John, his dearest friend on Earth. John had gone to see Fletcher and Gabe's concern was piqued... what was he doing with a bunch of hunters? He couldn't be planning revenge? Gabe sat in his apartment, Sam the dog curled up in his lap asleep and just stared at the wall. For hours he sat there with the internal struggle before he finally decided to pay one last visit to John Winchester. He gritted his teeth and balled his fists in frustration, scooping up Sam and placing him down gently before flying off.

John didn't recognize his new vessel, of course. Gabriel approached him on the road leaving Fletcher's house and introduced himself as a fellow hunter. They got through the formalities quickly... Gabe could have read his thoughts and gotten it all over with quickly but something in him longed to be near John again. He missed his friend so dearly and he felt so guilty about what had happened.

"So you're really planning to get into the business?" he probed.

John was far away, lost in his own thoughts. "Yeah. I'm thinking about it."

There was nothing to be done, John was so far lost in his thoughts that Gabe could only get the information he needed by going in there after him. He barely had to skirt the man's thoughts to realize that all he was thinking about was pain, regret, and revenge. Again, Gabe could have changed his mind right then, but a small part of his mind also cried for justice.

He was conflicted, he had doubts that John could do this but he wanted to have faith in him and give him that chance. John had done nothing but show Gabriel how to love humankind and how strong and amazing they were... how hard they  _try._  So he had to give him a chance. That's when he heard it, beneath the regrets about Mary... thoughts of his best friend Gabriel. It seemed as though John was convinced that his friend was killed by the same demon that got his wife. Well... the angel would leave the decisions of the future to free will, he owed John that much, but he would have to take one precaution at least.

"Alright, Well uh... best of luck to you." He reached out and patted his friend's shoulder in the polite way a stranger would… and it pained him to do it. When he removed his hand John forgot the encounter and ever meeting his friend Gabriel all those years before. As far as John Winchester was concerned, his friend Gabriel had never existed. And with that, Gabe felt that part of his life die away. It was just safer this way for both of them. He could never see John again.

Gabriel laid low and tried to live his life... well... Danny's life. But he kept an eye on John and the boys. He became increasingly angry at what he saw. Dean hardened and started to search for praise and love he wasn't getting. John's pain and anger trickled down to his sons. Sam, who knew nothing but this lonely pain, clung to his brother for any semblance of care. Both boys looked up to John. Dean asked about Gabriel once but the conversation escalated quickly.

A drunken, angry, and confused John left his son with a bruised heart, harsh words rattling in his head, and no answers. Dean vowed never to speak of Gabriel or his mother again. Not so much because his father had gotten so angry, but because he didn't want to disappoint him or cause him pain. He did everything he could to watch over Sammy, as his father ordered, and he allowed his weaknesses, like needing affection, to be buried under anger and purpose.

Gabriel couldn't watch any longer. He turned his attention to a pastime he hadn't picked up for years. Back in the day he had hidden from his family on occasion and paraded around as the god Loki. Since he was having such a miserable time trying to live Danny's life... he may as well indulge in the finer things that being a trickster offered.

As Sammy got older he started to resent the life Dean and his father had laid out for them. That's when he decided to run away, and soon he found himself in Flagstaff. Gabe was on alert the moment Sam left the protection of his brother. He couldn't keep a vigilant watch or the forces interested in the Winchesters might catch on... but he couldn't leave the kid all alone! And so Sam happened to stumble upon an old golden retriever that he quickly named Bones and brought back to the room with him.

Gabriel spent those two weeks eating pizza with the younger Winchester and curling up around him at night. It comforted him almost as much as it did Sam, but he tried not to admit it to himself. He was ashamed with humankind in light of John's mistakes. He didn't want to believe they were worth it anymore. And yet when Sam's small hand sifted through his fur he felt completely at peace, and his purpose as a guardian felt fulfilled for the first time in far too long.

In the following years Gabriel occasionally peeked in to see John drown the slightest possibility of happiness for his sons. He watched Dean harden in want of being like his father and he watched Sam grow to feel stuck between wanting to emulate his brother and wanting to get as far away as possible. As he watched he lost more and more faith in humanity as a whole. It was Mary and John that really taught the archangel to love humans and now it was John who would force him to hate them. When he returned to his trickster business he decided to graduate from feel good parlor tricks to pranks with a more sinister and deadly nature.

Human beings were wretched disappointments and the only joy he got was in punishing them for the smallest infraction. There was a kernel of affection buried somewhere deep under his frustration and bitterness but between his family back in Heaven and the Winchesters he was spent on caring. Gabe looked in on John and the boys less and less. He receded into his own private life, his 'witness protection', and spent his nights with his dog.

Through all these years Sam the dog had been a faithful companion. He accepted the transition from Danny to Gabriel well enough and they had bonded strongly. The angel found comfort in taking his pooch for a walk and lavishing him in the most gourmet treats. Little Sam lived the good life. He'd been living the good life for almost thirteen years.

Gabriel was beginning to notice his slowed pace, his limp. He was faced for the first time with mortality of something that he had grown attached to. It was... an entirely new sensation. He tried to ignore it, accept it for what it was, but one day when Sam curled up on his cushy bed and heaved an especially tired sigh, Gabriel broke.

Maybe he was still suffering from a touch of sentimentality, whatever the case... he felt certain he couldn't let this happen. It was a no-brainer really; he knelt down and took Sam's head in his hands gently, smiling at him with a somber affection before willing the dog's body to heal. "I'm sorry Sam, I just can't… please don't make me lose you now. You're all I have left." Maybe it was unfair to pull the dog back from the brink of peace like that, but he couldn't live this life on Earth alone and he wasn't ready to lose his friend.

Gabriel pulled the dog into his lap and patted his once-again-young head. Something about being completely alone and unknown in the world terrified him. No one on Earth or Heaven knew who he really was except for his canine companion and losing him was the angel's worst fear.

The years went on uneventfully. That is until Sam broke away and left for college... Gabe didn't know why he had decided to check in again, but something told him to. Good thing too, because occasionally watching Sam try to live a normal life in college sparked something in Gabe he hadn't felt since the Winchester's knew his name all those years ago - hope.

The trickster's curiosity with Sam Winchester was piqued once again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A lot of information for this chapter was gleaned from reading John Winchester's journal, it's a good read and you should pick it up! I'm going out of town until Jan. 26th but will resume writing this upon my return~!


	5. Chapter 5

Gabe mostly stuck to his own business, the world was full of cheating husbands and deadbeat dads so he had an almost fulltime job. After so many years his anger was finally beginning to fade away.

Interacting with humans had stained his preconceived feelings about the race, but he was as close to angelic condescension as he would ever be again in his lifetime. The angels didn't care about humans, the only time they regarded them with something other than apathy was when they looked down on them...and Gabriel remembered why. These humans were ants underneath his superior boot.

An angel wouldn't touch them for fear of repercussion...but Loki? A god? He played by his own rules.

And so it was that Loki continued to carry out swift justice to small-time villains all over the states.

After a while his pranks took a turn for the hilarious, he felt his spirits rise and his creativity peak as his personal resentment was appeased. Cheating husbands found themselves chased down the road and slaughtered by a swarm of crabs, a car thief who was quizzed on advanced calculus by a car radio was then sucked into the cassette slot when he failed. Nothing too showy.

He kept on the move and set up other supernatural beings to take the fall for him if hunters got on his tail, it was the most fun he'd had in years!

As for his private time...he had, in the past, fallen into bed with Kali. She wasn't an unknown in his life by far and somewhere deep down he knew she recognized that his story was suspicious. She was on to him from day one...that's why he liked her...she was a smart girl. Even she was taken off guard by the nature of his new found humor, but she was happy to have her fellow God back on the grid at all and they often met in the dead of night to explore their "feelings".

Kali was never much troubled with the change of face, as a God humans often blended together for her... and she understood needing a makeover. It just wasn't a big concern in her eyes, though it gave credence to the possibility that this man was indeed not Loki...she'd never say as much and implicate herself in the deceit.

Gabriel had never been so crazy about candy, but now that he was living the highlife he felt like he owed it to Danny to indulge. Sweets definitely weren't unpleasant and before long he had a major taste for them, walking everywhere with his tongue rolling over a lollipop.

Who said angels can't get addictions!

It felt good to do something for Danny...but he could only fool himself for so long. He knew from the way the human's soul no longer thrummed and brushed against his grace that Danny was no longer with him. He'd wasted the rest of his vessel's time with his brooding and there was no doubt in his mind that Danny went down horrified by the deeds performed by his own hands.

Gabriel bit his tongue, put on a foxy smile, and never thought about it again. He'd live in his sweet lie to avoid the pain of the truth...maybe humans rubbed off on him more than he thought.

Time passed quickly, Gabe terrorized the world for a handful of years while he kept an eye on Sam's progress. The human started dating a sweet girl named Jessica and the archangel thought that just maybe he'd make it in the world with a normal life. He felt a little pride thinking the Sam Winchester still had an angel on his shoulders looking out for him. The younger Winchester was preparing to go on for a law degree and everything was right in the world.

Until Dean showed up at the door.

Gabriel had loved Dean like one of his own, but even he was upset to see the elder brother back in Sam's life. This meant trouble. As stealthily as he could, Gabe stayed tuned in to what was going on and he was pained to hear that John was missing. It was finally time, wasn't it? For his friend to pay for his obsessive desire for revenge. It wasn't Gabe's problem, though! He'd stay out of it. It was ridiculous to pretend that he owed anything to that mess of a man or his sons.

Two days later Jessica was dead. Gabriel had failed Sam once again. He straddled between wanting to help them and wanting to avoid responsibility by helping himself. And this was the cost. Another tragedy in the Winchester family.

Sam was going to go with Dean...Gabe turned away and put more effort into his "day job".

The Winchester's were not his problem (and he would never admit, even to himself, that he simply couldn't live with how useless and disappointing he felt).

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am back! This is a small chapter compared to the others and i'm writing the next one... it encompasses all of Gabriel's canon spn episodes. Sorry for the wait, lovelies!


	6. Chapter 6

Gabe's new addiction to sweets fit fantastically with his trickster 'guise, but this was the first time in all his trickery that he actually enjoyed it as well.

He avoided contact with human kind at all costs, he had convinced himself that John Winchester was dead and his soul was out of reach. The archangel didn't even give himself a moment to mourn, he just buried the feelings somewhere deep and forgot about them, bundled in the regret of his anger. But one of the main things that always grounded Gabriel to humankind was Sam. No not the Winchester boy, the dog. Don't get confused, now. He knew he could cover most of puppy Sam's needs with his angelic powers but there were benefits to getting....outside assistance. And that's what brought Gabriel, an archangel, to the veterinarian.

As far as the vet was concerned, Gabriel was an eccentric almost middle-aged man who had owned two Jack Russell Terriers of very similar temperament...both named Sam. It didn't seem to bother her at all.

The jack russell was a relief in the office, he sat still for all his shots and hardly cried...no one would ever guess it had something to do with a little mental soothing from an old winged friend. When they were done he would scoop the pup up in his arms and grin, offering him a lick of a lollipop "Good kids get lollipops when they behave at the doctor so why not you, eh kiddo?" he nearly giggled to himself and then let the dog roam the grounds within reason while he schmoozed the veterinarian.

Gabriel wasn't some whore or anything but he did enjoy sex, ever since he first tried it. It was different for angels. Angels were created to fill purposeful job niches in the name of Heaven and they had no need to procreate, so they didn't have all the pleasure centers built in that humans did. In his true form there wasn't much about Gabe that could be turned on and sexual encounters were a mental experience more than a physical need.

For humans though, oh god his skin tingled and he heat crept through-out him. The best part was that often times it lacked the connection that angels experienced, so he didn't have to feel as vulnerable when he did it.

It wasn't just with humans, either, sex while in his vessel at all was mind-blowing and he couldn't imagine ever wanting to leave Earth after an experience like that. He and Kali still met whenever their shenanigans allowed to play the game of cat and mouse in bed...Gabriel often times found himself to be the mouse. But his relationship with Kali was open at best, sure he had feelings there but he knew she didn't love him...she loved Loki and she wouldn't even admit to _that._

 Nothing wrong with that.

 It wasn't long before he and the lovely animal doctor were exploring their more animal like traits between the sheets.

This went on for ages, time started to bleed together for the archangel, but every once in a while ugly reminders of the coming storm crept on the edges of his perfectly constructed world. He couldn't keep his head buried in the sand much longer, there were only a few short years left before the apocalypse would be upon them. Soon his younger brethren in Heaven would begin to realize that things were not as they should be. The management shift would be out in the open and he had no idea what would happen next.

Even Gabriel couldn't predict the events the Winchester boys and his brother Castiel would put into play. And so he operated on the assumption that there was no choice but to play by the script.

Maybe it was time to pay the boys a visit. And so the trickster picked a random town and set the stage for the Winchester's to come "hunt" him. He popped into the town to cause trouble and made sure he flew home every night to tend to his dog and plan the next couple pranks. Everything was by the trickster book, and it didn't take long before a familiar black impala rolled its way onto his turf.

The Trickster locked up the old college and shrugged off his latest victim, the scum deserved it that's for sure. He peeked in on the boys and had to bite his lip to keep from snickering at the way they argued like a married couple. They'd been travelling together so long that their co-dependency was palpable. Their sibling rivalry was touching, John would have been proud to see them now.

He wasn't surprised when they came to see the scene of the crime, but it was the first time he talked to the boys face to face since Dean was a toddler. He fed them the lines, his script, and tried to keep himself from showing how he really felt.

Seeing Dean and Sam in person this way was pretty staggering, they towered over him to say the least. God this new vessel really _was_ tiny. They were out as quick as they came and the Trickster cloaked himself to check in on them again as they began to piece it all together. He nearly burst out laughing just watching the boys take it in. At least Dean realized his prowess, yes his pranks _were_ poetic. Planting Sam's money clip near the busted car was a true stroke of genius. It was too goddamn easy to pit these two against each other.

He flew back to his home base and settled in, he was really digging the checkers and Samdog liked it all too. Living in this kind of luxury was just what they needed. What they _both_ needed. But the next day it was time to get iced...not for real of course. The main act was afoot.

He knew what the boys were back at the college for the second they walked in, but he made a point to pull himself up on the stairs and get a sassy close-up look at Sam. He was enjoying this way too much, his spirits hadn't been this high in ages. Through all the sadness and disappointment...he still loved the Winchester family. When they left he watched them through the window and it was just too much..WOW what did they need to think it was him? Sugar? Well damn he could _eat_ sugar for show. The tall tales he was weaving were so self explanatory! They were making this way too difficult. And then they were fighting again, _just great._ He'd be here all year at this point.

That night Dean was the one that came to stake him out and he was actually thankful for that. His guilt over Dean's life was slightly overshadowed by resentment of the way he reflected his father's mistakes. The way he was covering up all the things inside his soul that resembled his wonderful _mother_ in a dire attempt to be more like his father.

The Trickster set the scene in the auditorium and waited for Dean to play catch up. He was finally able to say it out loud, that he liked Sam and Dean, and he _did_. But not just because they were good people, because he loved them like the only remaining relics of his past.

When Sam popped through the door Gabe was happy to be able to use the trick from the last magazine he'd read, even happier that the monster was slow and cumbersome. He didn't mind tossing the boys around but he couldn't hurt them too badly. He wanted to say that it was planned for his decoy to be staked so soon but truth is that they were clever little assholes. Maybe they got a little bit of a jump on him. Watching Dean drive a stake into his decoy was almost cathartic. In a way he wished it could have been him, that he hadn't chickened out, he deserved to feel that pain. Still... it was over,  the hunters thought he was dead and he got to see them again, a job well done if he said so himself.

A part of him had hoped this would be the last time he had to interact with them, but a selfish part of him wished for more.

Careful what you wish for.

The co-dependency that he'd witnessed during the Winchesters vs. The Trickster special was festering and threatening to destroy them. He knew all about the times they'd lost one another and how in the future it would happen again.

Call him attached or sentimental or whatever you want...but he felt the need to step in and teach a lesson where John was no longer here to do it. Problem is he only knew how to operate in pranks.

Gabe didn't have a special thing for Tuesdays, but when Sammy woke up and said he'd kill himself if he heard that Asia song again, and seemed so utterly annoyed with Dean, Gabe KNEW this was the day he needed to repeat. For humor's sake.

The first time Dean died was the worst, Gabe almost flinched...watching Sam so torn up.... and then the game began.

 Heat of the Moment.

Sam was sure he had some kind of premonition, this strong feeling of not deja vu but deja vu was driving him nuts. Since Gabe knew it was all a trick he simply enjoyed the ride, listening to Sammy put it all together over and over again. Sam had the most adorable confused face, and his Winchester brother logic was knee-slapping hilarious.

Gabe spoke to himself a lot those days "Oh yeah Sam, it's all the Mystery Spot's fault...and just to prove it...i'll have the mystery spot man kill him again." Yes, this was his greatest masterpiece.

Sitting at the diner was the best, though, listening to Sam try and talk Dean into it every morning. He's so flustered, aw.

Then it happened, Sam said "Twice now i've watched you die and I can't do it again..." and Gabe didn't think it was as funny anymore.

He needed to break Sam from that, to save him later by hurting him now. Gabriel watched Sam go through a transformation of many emotions...Sam had no idea that there was no breaking the curse...just watching Dean die over and over until he didn't care anymore. When Sam tried to fight it, Gabe just had to kill him faster.

No...Sam had to play by the script and he had to say goodbye to his brother. He hated to hurt Sam like this...but he needed to help him. Be Cruel to be Kind kinda stuff. Maybe that should have been the alarm song...

100th Tuesday, Sam was starting to catch on. There was no escape, there was no trick. That's right Sam...no matter what you do Dean dies.  The Trickster fist pumped the air, "FINALLY. MY JOB HERE IS DONE. NOW PHASE TWO." Even he was getting sick of Tuesdays. Dean didn't need to die today, Gabe snapped his fingers and it was Tuesday again, Bravo moose, Bravo.

The slip up was on purpose...Sam had been through enough. It was time to throw him a bone if he was tired enough to pick up on it. Plus Gabe was getting tired of eating waffles every morning. And if he heard that goddamn Asia song again he'd kill himself.

Gabe had thought he'd finally gotten through...but Sam still had too much fight in him...it wasn't just Tuesday that was cursed...it was the rest of his life!  This was reality.

So Dean had to die on Wednesday.

And Sam didn't wake up...no do-overs.

This was reality. Gabe wasn't laughing. He couldn't even look. What he saw of Sam after that day, though, changed his mind.

Sam became a killing machine and the opposite of what Gabe had ever wanted. It became apparent to him that there was no way for Sam to get out of this unscathed. His heart would always betray him for Dean.

But while Gabriel had Dean "dead" he let him have peace...and he took care of him. He couldn't let Dean actually die or the angels would realize he was no Trickster. So in his spare time Gabe fed Dean pie, stealing his whipped cream and giving him a Heaven that God himself couldn't one-up. It was painfully good to have the past back, even if the Winchester wouldn't remember. 

Meanwhile, the "Sam" that Gabriel's experiment had produced wasn't the Sam he was trying to save at all. Pretending to be Bobby wasn't easy, definitely not his normal MO. It took him a while to compose himself enough to pretend like this was all a joke. Gabe thought he could keep his composure through the bartering...through everything...but those _puppy dog eyes_.

He barely heard himself talking until "And this is what life's gonna be like without him".  The archangel gave in. This was useless...he may as well crawl back under the rock he came from. But now he'd hide under that rock and never get the images of Sam's hatred out of his eyes. Helping people was harder than he thought.

Sam was disgusted as he looked at the hotel room for the last time, the room that he'd woken up in over a hundred times. He never wanted to see it again. Gabriel watched his lip quiver and tears build in his eyes..tears of relief.

The archangel himself couldn't find a moment's peace. Dean was gone again and he knew that the boys were headed down a path of destruction and heartbreak. He couldn't stop it. So he'd just ignore it all.

He gave it the good ole' American try, right? Maybe John would be proud of him...

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here you go, I hope you enjoy this long chapter. It was tougher than I thought it would be and I cranked it out in like an hour but I wanted to make sure it would be done for you guys before too long. Tell me what you think!


	7. Chapter 7

 

Gabriel seemed to defy gravity when he walked; every couple of steps he'd break out a subtle dance move in tune to the music coming from his iPod. He was content putting on a happy face for the neighborhood as he took his four legged companion on a walk, and then continuing the facade in his own home.

The only way to keep ahead of his problems was to keep running from them, but the Jack Russell wasn't fooled; he paid his owner extra attention and worried over him as Gabriel pretended not to notice.

Once they were safely back inside he snapped to lock the doors and bounded into the kitchen, and that's when a familiar song blasted in his ears. Without thinking, he sang

_I never meant to be so bad to you  
One thing I said that I would never do  
One look from you and I would fall from grace  
And that would wipe this smile right from my face_ __  
  


He stopped and sighed hard, and for the first time the words hit him. It wasn't as if he picked that song on purpose, but it seemed now in retrospect as some kind of cruel fated joke. Was it his father's doing? He didn't think so; after all, his father was MIA. Still, he cut back in and sang again with less spirit as he poured himself a drink.

 _It was the heat of the moment_  
Telling me what your heart meant  
Heat of the moment shone in your eyes

 _And when your looks are gone and you're alone_  
How many nights you sit beside the phone  
What were the things you wanted for yourself  
Teenage ambition you remember well

It had been months since he last saw the boys. He flopped down in his chair and took a long drink, pulling out his earbuds and tossing the iPod to the floor, "Oh Sammy...why couldn't you just _listen_ to me..."

The dog perked up at the mention of his name, hopping up in his friend's lap and the archangel shook his head lovingly, "Not you, ya putz." Still, he scratched Samdog behind the ears and all his uncertainties faded away for the moment.

Since the Trickster business he had been feeling a lot of haunting doubt. He knew what was in store for the future, but as every month passed by, he didn't want it. More and more he wanted to go back to that day and stay and fight. Fight for the Winchesters. Keep his rightful place as an angel of the lord. The day he left Sam in his crib to the fates of corrupted angels...that was the day he left his grace behind him. What right did he have to call himself an angel now? To help anyone? He was a coward, the poorest excuse for an archangel to ever stain Heaven or Earth.

Most nights he buried his doubts as far down as he could and distracted himself. Whether it was with the veterinarian or Kali, any distraction helped. Something in Kali, especially, made him think that he could get out of this cycle and leave all the fighting and the past behind him. He wanted so badly to love her, because that was his escape. And so he did. He was good to her and she had him under her thumb, but he didn't mind.

If it wasn't for Castiel, Gabriel might not have gotten involved again at all...or at least not so soon. Hearing about his brother rebelling against Heaven and siding with the Winchesters put Gabe in a foul mood.

Maybe it was because Castiel was succeeding where he didn't. Or maybe it was because he knew that having the angel on their side would help the Winchesters draw out the bloodshed even longer. Gabriel didn't approve of his brother's actions, but that sure as hell didn't mean he wanted them all killing one another. Any time he allowed himself to tap into the events going on around him he got more and more angry.

Then one day he couldn't stand it anymore. Time to pay the boys another visit.

The trick he made up for them this time was even more elaborate than before; it was a beautiful work of art. Gabriel knew that they were all following scripts and he was sick to death of watching the boys fight it so hard. There were only two ways, you give in or you run. And since they were human, their chances for running were more slim...since they were Winchesters, their chances for running were ZERO. Gabriel had never met a Winchester that backed down from a fight, even when it was good for them.

Setting up the "hunt" was easy, plant some candy wrappers and an easy story. But watching the boys...something hit him. Sam. Sam said Dean shouldn't kill him...he wanted to _talk?_ "Ohh Sam...you're pulling my heartstrings," he laughed and took a bite of his next candybar as he went to take care of the next kill. But maybe...maybe in a way this meant Sam forgave him?

Still, business was business. There was no time to get sentimental if he wanted this all to end.

He trapped the boys in a world where they would be forced to do what they needed to, _play their roles_. Otherwise they would suffer. Call it Pavlovian conditioning. Follow the script, don't get hurt. Fair enough, right? He just...wouldn't tell them the rules right out. If he did it wouldn't be any fun at all! (or fall into the normal behavior of a Trickster).

Fun...he deserved to have some fun! He rounded the corner, wearing his newest lab coat disguise. He didn't expect the goofy smile Dean gave him as he walked down the hall, averting his eyes. Gabe forced his own giggly amusement down, though, and gave the kid a hard time.

Dean balked and tried to be serious, thinking up his "one reason" for disobeying the orders of the ever so perfect  Doctor Sexy. Then it happened, he picked up on the clue...and so soon too... At least Dean showed his hand as a fanboy for this one.

He took Dean by the arm, relishing in the way he could show his true strength, and went along with his self-touting monologue. Honestly he was proud of himself, humiliating them both was the most fun a Trickster could have without killing people! And he did it with _style_.

Unfortunately for Sam, this was all _his_ fault for not getting the message the first time...so he was extra hard on the younger Winchester. Making Sam the butt of all his jokes did, in some way, tickle Gabe. Things were actually going predictably until he felt a presence scratching at the sides of his illusions.

Castiel tried to infiltrate his operation and a well of resentment boiled in Gabriel's gut. He transported his brother away and restrained him. Mr. Trickster doesn't _like_ pretty boy angels...that was an understatement. The program, the world he built, ran on schedule in his absence.

He didn't get to see Sam and Dean catch on, or get to see some of the best parts of Sam's humiliation. But it was worth it just knowing what was going on.

He couldn't deal with Castiel directly unless he wanted to risk being found out. He might still be able to get out of this undiscovered. And so he sent in "actors" to knock some sense into his younger brother. However, in his rage he may have overdone it a touch.

"What do you think you're doing?" his stand-in hissed, eyes burning with anger "What gave you the right to barge in on this game, _angel?_ "

Something shifted in the Trickster; he held his head a little higher and everything about him demanded respect, but Cas only saw the change in the "actor". The angel found himself struck again and he mustered all his energy to break loose from the confinement. Something was very wrong about this "trickster" and he needed to warn Sam and Dean.

Cas slipped out of the Trickster's fingers and made a bee-line for the boys, but Gabe couldn't let it go on for long. The second Castiel spouted his flimsy theory, the Trickster burst open the door and threw him against the wall. He knew he was going to be spotted, to be found out, so the duct tape was a must.

This was the first time an angel laid eyes on him, recognized him, for _years._ He kept his composure and grinned " _Hi, Castiel~"_ and then sent him away again. The way the boys worried after the angel infuriated him. Why did they always care about everyone other than themselves?! (and why didn't he stick around so he could be the angel they worried over...)

Gabe had done all he could, as far as he was concerned, to stop them from starting this nonstop train straight for apocalypse-ville, but it was far too late now. Didn't they realize it? Fighting had never been the answer and now they had no choice, now they were just hurting themselves and everyone else fighting the inevitable. It hurt him to consign them to death this way, but he was tired and angry and a part of him just wanted to go home. He'd put his heart out on the line for humankind one too many times and had nothing to show for it but dead brothers and resentment.

Dean asking him what side he was on took him off guard. His insides cringed at the thought, he couldn't admit to being evil but he lost his right to call himself an angel a long time ago. He wasn't on either side, and a pit of self loathing burned in his stomach at the forced memory.

Dean shook his head "...No... you're somebody's bitch." and that was it, Gabe slipped, his hands shot out before his brain could keep up and he shoved the elder Winchester against the wall. The silly Trickster 'guise he had been working so hard to maintain fell off of him in a split second "Don't you ever, _ever_ presume to know what I am." he nearly growled, and now it was time for business.

Sam and Dean _would_ suck it up and play their roles, give in to their responsibilities, just like Gabriel should have that night standing over the crib. The words spilled out of his mouth but his mind was somewhere else for the moment. He had a responsibility to the Winchesters and he chickened out of upholding it. He knew what happened when you turned down your role, he was living it. And if losing them meant setting things right, that was what he would have to do.

Sam was suspicious, afraid even "..and if we don't?"

Gabe felt a twinge of guilt, and of hope. "Then you'll stay here in TVland, Forever." Could it be that easy? Could he keep them here forever? Keep them safe? They'd never agree to it, they had too much fight in them, and Heaven would catch up to them eventually.  "Three hundred channels and uh....nothin's on." he shrugged and snapped, sending them into the next phase.

The cop procedural went as planned, they took the bait and then turned on him. Okay okay okay, the second part took him by surprise but he went down easy and "let them go". This was the perfect opportunity to recollect himself and buy some private time with his brother.

Gabriel was on his younger brother in seconds, a sneer on his face as he gripped him tight and rose him from the filthy ground.

"Where were you before? Where were you when it mattered? You know _nothing_ about what's going on. You think you're helping but you're leading these boys into damnation. Castiel you are _wrong._ Stay out of my way while I do my part to _save_ whatever is left of them!"

So many thoughts went through Castiel's mind, but his mouth was still covered; his elder brother didn't want to hear his pleas or excuses. Were family reunions among angels _ever_ loving things? Gabriel was alive, Gabriel was hiding out as a lowly trickster...and the truth is that all this meant was that he had _run_. Both the angels knew that in this very moment everything was falling apart around them. Castiel had, by siding with the Winchesters, changed the flow of events and ruined everything Gabriel was trying to do, trying to hide from. He had done what Gabriel was afraid to do, and the elder angel would never fully forgive him for that...or forgive himself.

The realization dawned on the archangel and he gritted his teeth, throwing the younger angel mercilessly to the ground once again. His fist clenched but it was no use finding another outlet for his anger. And while he was distracted, Dean and Sam had found him out they were still in the game and it sounded like they wanted to give up. He had to go back and play game-master. This one was arguably his favorite anyway.

Gabe composed himself, put on his best Trickster face, and went to pick up where he left off. He grinned and walked up "Wow Sam, get a load of the rims on you!" he couldn't help but tease them, especially if this was the last time he'd get to see them.

But he found himself trapped, instead. Dealing with Castiel had distracted them, he was called out as an angel and he felt a chill run through his veins. The jig was up....and now there would never be any turning back for any of them.

He really didn't know when he gave himself away but the boys were happy to point out his obvious flaws. Family...they really were weak point...even if he wanted to hate them. When the boys asked his name all he could say was "They call me Gabriel." because in his mind? that was just a name and one he didn't deserve anymore.

It was time to be totally honest. It felt good to talk about his family again, even if he had to defend them to Dean. Relief welled up in his chest, nothing could be stopped and he was hiding in his witness protection and now he could say it all. This was the most cathartic thing he'd done in years. Time to drive the point home for the boys, too.

Now they knew, about his interest, about the fact that Heaven always knew about the Winchesters. Cas was brought up again, of course, and Dean was all tough with the threats...Gabe spared a look towards Sam who had stood up for him before as if to say 'you still got my back?' but he wasn't an idiot. Why would Sam ever save him? Why would he stand up to Dean for an angel ex-trickster that caused him nothing but suffering? He brought their precious Castiel back.

He was almost sure they planned on leaving him in that holy fire, he did kind of deserve it...but instead they let him go. Not without some jabs first, of course. Dean was fed up.

 "This is about you being too afraid to stand up to your family!" he accused, more rightfully so than he knew, and for a moment Gabriel was petrified as he wondered if Dean knew his secrets.

When they left him in that warehouse, all he could do was stand there and think about what happened; he didn't even care that he was soaked. Dean was right; every single thing that happened was because of how afraid he was to stand up to his brothers.

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HAPPY BIRTHDAY TIGER (thank you for the edits!)


End file.
